good JOKE for ya...

[lowboy]

She can't say pimp daddy.

[CPDMF]

She can barely say Cliff.

[General Septem]

Haha, my problem is that nobody can seem to spell my last name. I'm not saying what it is, but almost half the time it's spelled wrong, and it's always the same single-letter error, and we're talking about professional settings here.

 

Oddly enough, my online pseudonym shares the exact same trait, and it's actually more annoying when people call me "Septum" than when they misspell my real last name.

[Evil_inc]

Haha, my problem is that nobody can seem to spell my last name. I'm not saying what it is, but almost half the time it's spelled wrong, and it's always the same single-letter error, and we're talking about professional settings here.

 

ditto

[soundx98]

Do you pronounce it "ink" of "eye-nk", Evil?

[ReelFiles]

I think it's short for incorporated. Thinking of "Damage Inc." by Metallica., correct me if I am wrong.

[ReelFiles]

fck on fngr typng

 

LMFAO, but then I felt like a jerk because he really hurt himself.

[soundx98]

Subject: Gambling Blonde

 

Two bored casino dealers are waiting at the crap table.

A very attractive blonde woman from Alabama arrived ..and bet twenty-thousand dollars ($20,000) on a single roll of the dice.

 

She said, "I hope you don't mind, but I feel much luckier when I play topless."

 

With that, she stripped to the waist; rolled the dice; and yelled,

"Come on, baby.... Southern Girl needs new clothes!"

 

As the dice came to a stop, she jumped up-and-down... and squealed...

"YES! YES! I WON! I WON!"

 

She hugged each of the dealers... and then picked up her winnings and her clothes, and quickly departed.

 

The dealers stared at each other dumfounded. Finally, one of them asked, "What did she roll?"

 

The other answered, "I don't know... I thought you were watching."

 

Moral ---

Not all Southerners are stupid.

Not all blondes are dumb.

But, all men..... are men.

[ReelFiles]

Nice, I don't think I would have noticed either, LOL.

[red930]

Honest to goodness this type of thing has happened in real casinos.

 

Normally it's done right at the sift change from swing to grave which is very early in the morning.

 

The surveillance tapes are always very popular and sometimes worth the loss.

[Kandoo]

A Russian And A Redneck Wrestler Were Set To Square Off For The Olympic

Gold Medal. Before The Final Match, The Redneck Wrestler's Trainer Came

To Him And Said, "now, Don't Forget All The Research We've Done On This

Russian. He's Never Lost A Match Because Of This 'pretzel' Hold He Has.

Whatever You Do, Do Not Let Him Get You In That Hold! If He Does, You're

Finished"; The Redneck Nodded In Acknowledgment.

> >

As The Match Started, The Redneck And The Russian Circled Each Other

Several Times, Looking For An Opening.

> >

All Of A Sudden, The Russian Lunged Forward, Grabbing The Redneck And

Wrapping Him Up In The Dreaded Pretzel Hold. A Sigh Of Disappointment

Arose

From The Crowd And The Trainer Buried His Face In His Hands, For He Knew

All Was Lost. He Couldn't Watch The Inevitable Happen.

 

Suddenly, There Was A Scream, Then A Cheer From The Crowd Andthe Trainer

Raised His Eyes Just In Time To Watch The Russian Go Flying Up In The Air.

His Back Hit The Mat With A Thud And The Redneck Collapsed On Top Of Him

Making The Pin And Winning The Match.

> >

The Trainer Was Astounded. When He Finally Got His Wrestler Alone, He

Asked, "how Did You Ever Get Out Of That Hold? No One Has Ever Done It Before!"

> >

The Wrestler Answered "well, I Was Ready To Give Up When He Got Me In

That Hold But At The Last Moment, I Opened My Eyes And Saw This Pair Of

Testicles Right In Front Of My Face. I Had Nothing To Lose So With My

Last Ounce Of Strength I Stretched Ut My Neck And Bit Those Babies Just As

Hard As I Could."

> >

So The Trainer Exclaimed, "that's What Finished Him Off?"

 

"not Really. You'd Be Amazed How Strong You Get When You Bite Your Own Nuts.

[Anospa]

Hhahaha, ... ouch