Stonerboy779 Posted May 29, 2012 Posted May 29, 2012 The Little Girl And A Bird A guy was sunbathing in the nude on the beach. He saw a little girl coming towards him, so he covered himself with the newspaper he was reading. The girl came up to him and asked “What do you have under the newspaper, mister?” “Nothing. Just a stupid bird,” the guy replied. The little girl walked away and the guy fell asleep. When he woke up, he was in a hospital in tremendous pain. When the Police asked him what happened, the guy replied, “I don’t know. I was lying on the beach, this girl asked me about my privates, and the next thing I know is I’m here.” Police went back to the beach, found the girl, and asked her “What did you do to that naked fellow?” After a little pause, the girl replied, “To him? Nothing. I was playing with the bird and it spit on me, so I broke its neck, cracked its eggs, and set its nest on fire.” Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Prunes Posted May 29, 2012 Posted May 29, 2012 The Little Girl And A Bird A guy was sunbathing in the nude on the beach. He saw a little girl coming towards him, so he covered himself with the newspaper he was reading. The girl came up to him and asked “What do you have under the newspaper, mister?” “Nothing. Just a stupid bird,” the guy replied. The little girl walked away and the guy fell asleep. When he woke up, he was in a hospital in tremendous pain. When the Police asked him what happened, the guy replied, “I don’t know. I was lying on the beach, this girl asked me about my privates, and the next thing I know is I’m here.” Police went back to the beach, found the girl, and asked her “What did you do to that naked fellow?” After a little pause, the girl replied, “To him? Nothing. I was playing with the bird and it spit on me, so I broke its neck, cracked its eggs, and set its nest on fire.” Old classic. Still a good laugh though Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
makarov Posted June 28, 2012 Posted June 28, 2012 (edited) are we allowed to say jokes about the collingwood football club? If so I've got plenty... Edited June 28, 2012 by makarov Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stonerboy779 Posted June 28, 2012 Posted June 28, 2012 are we allowed to say jokes about the collingwood football club? If so I've got plenty... Collingwood itself is a joke... The biggest joke of all is Eddie Oh and I senserily hate him and hope he gets run over by a team in the city one day. Seriously who would could possibly want to get rid of the last part of melbournes Olumpic heritige. I loved competing at Olympic Park going there using the track and having fun at the meets. Then Eddie has a cry because his precious players are walking 400m too far from the Lexus center to get to the training ground up the road. Then because he was a member of the Olympic park commity and because he owns chilling wood the simple solution get rid of Olympic park because the pathetic team Collingwood couldn't possibly walk 400m extra to train. /rant Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skidmarks Posted June 28, 2012 Posted June 28, 2012 The other day I received a flyer in the mailbox informing me that I could still have . at 83. I was very excited because I stay at 57. It's only a couple of blocks walk. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nerm Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 I will apologize ahead of time for the level of nerdy on this joke but just heard it this morning and found it amusing. "What is the best thing about a RIP joke?....It can be told 15 times." Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
My_Inner_Fred Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 (edited) 2. Keep jokes PG-13 level. This means no swearing, racist remarks, or sexually based jokes. Shoot I'd have lots of em if it weren't for that one. Edited July 9, 2012 by My_Inner_Fred Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onion Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 Shoot I'd have lots of em if it weren't for that one. There goes my joke database. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
My_Inner_Fred Posted July 9, 2012 Posted July 9, 2012 There goes my joke database. Haha you to huh? You bastard XD Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onion Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 Haha you to huh? You bastard XD I think it's time for some private messages. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stonerboy779 Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 I think it's time for some private messages. You advance the relationship quick don't you At least buy him some lunch first. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
Onion Posted July 10, 2012 Posted July 10, 2012 You advance the relationship quick don't you At least buy him some lunch first. No no, the better half wouldn't appreciate that very much. Share this post Link to post Share on other sites More sharing options...
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