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#1 greengiant912

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Posted 04 April 2012 - 08:41 PM

So anyways, my social life has been kinda on the decline for awhile, for various reasons.


I know a lot of people on here will be like who needs a social life when you have internet friends... I would argue that one still needs to have a healthy social life though.


Maybe its because of the winter or something but it seems like a lot of the people I used to hangout with a lot are kinda drifting away. They dont return text messages, calls, etc... When I ask someone if they want to hangout often times there is no reply. Its not like I am annoying with doing this either. I think once every few weeks I will ask my buddy if he wants to go do something.

Anyways to the point I guess, I haven't really been going out or being social lately. The only people I really talk to are those at work and school. Maybe its a sign of getting older... Then I see my group of friends doing stuff without me (facebook and whatnot) it kinda bugs me. I think its all because of their new roommate too, I had no problem against the guy but he just dosen't like me it seems... So I think they have been excluding me at his request... It just sucks when I am at home on a Friday night and just sitting around all the time. I am too young to for this, how am I supposed to meet anyone if the social aspect is non existent in my life...


Anyways this is a rant I guess. I guess I am just a little frustrated at myself, I have never felt as lazy as I do now. I have kinda lost all confidence and motivation to go out and socialize.


What dose everyone else do to meet people / socialize? Not involving the Internet :P

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#2 El_Capitan

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Posted 04 April 2012 - 08:48 PM

I find most of what people do socially as monotonous and boring. However, I'm probably not the norm.

Figure out things you like to do, and see if there's a social club for that.

#3 Deathmineral

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Posted 04 April 2012 - 10:09 PM

I find most of what people do socially as monotonous and boring. However, I'm probably not the norm.

Figure out things you like to do, and see if there's a social club for that.

I agree with this, finding people with common interests is a good way to meet people.

Personally, I've tried texting or calling up some of my old friends quite a few times and I've just never gotten a response from any of them really. So my whole social life is really through the internet, I don't consider that a bad thing though, I think I just have an easier time finding like minded people online, mostly because a lot of what I'm into just doesn't even exist in my area.

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#4 bp9801

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Posted 05 April 2012 - 12:28 AM

Personally, I've tried texting or calling up some of my old friends quite a few times and I've just never gotten a response from any of them really. So my whole social life is really through the internet, I don't consider that a bad thing though, I think I just have an easier time finding like minded people online, mostly because a lot of what I'm into just doesn't even exist in my area.


This times a thousand. I have a few friends around the area I live that have similar interests to mine, and then a couple friends from where I use to live. Anyone else just doesn't respond to texts or calls or anything. Their loss, really.


What about looking at different groups in your area? Something for gamers or people who like hiking and things like that?

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#5 Il_napoletano

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Posted 05 April 2012 - 04:45 AM

Personally..i enjoy socialising..I try and go out as often as possible..but I get what you mean.

I had a good friend like that, we were best mates..but then he got himself a gf and it sort of blocked our friendship..We hardly talked, but in the end they split..and i found out that he wanted to go out with his us(his friends) but if he said he's going out with his friends, she would kick up a jealous fit..and tell him to choose her or his friends..in the end(6months after) he said "friends" and now we're best mates again :D

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#6 dragonsdontfly

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Posted 05 April 2012 - 07:09 AM

I found ONE great friend in recent years.. Because I beat him up at a bar over my girlfriend at the time (Starting to notice a trend here.. hmm). But seriously, this guy has been my one real friend in the last few years. Everybody else was just an aquiantance. I'm going to explain the story: Because it tells a lesson about letting things happen naturally, usually works out for the best.

It was weird, think of the biggest troll you ever met: Then put him in a "pretty boy's" body and give gim a bunch of money and make him a genetic drunk with perfect hair: He was the single most annoying, pussified prick I've ever met, but he was hilarious and fun as heck to hang out with. We spent days on end trolling people in real life and drinking like fish (This guy made me a pseudo alcoholic).
Oddly enough, the bar fight really was the reason we became best friends. Because 8 months later I met him outside the same bar again, and he was having the same issue with his girlfriend I had with him and mine. He showed me his hand (which was surgically reconstructed after our fight) and told me he needed a hand. I didn't exactly like him at that point, but some things you just don't let happen: SO I walked in the bar and pulled the same thing to the guy harassing his girlfriend.
Next thing you know, we were best friends. Driving drunk as heck down the highway (we don't drink and drive, we drink THEN drive), singing like two teenage girls in public, pretending to be gay even just to mess with peoples' heads.. We had no inhibitions, we were like crazy little teenage girls haha.
I've never had so much fun with a single person (except Christy, but girlfriend doesn't count). And he was the LAST person I ever expected to be best friends with. I didn't go looking for a friend, as a matter of fact I did the opposite in flipping on him like I did; But life went about it's business and found me the single best friend I have ever had: The one dude that could make me act like a childish a-hole and enjoy it (that was NEVER me, but with Rikk it's who I become lol.)

Christy always tells me she's going to kill him when we get married, because she knows how the bachelor party is gonna go down. And she knows no matter what I say, it'll be Rikk's chance to troll me and her both.. This guy is nuts, and I met him by chance because life thought I should.
Every friend I ever TRIED TO MAKE was a boring, stupid, or generally agitating moron: Or nothing more than an okay acquaintanceship.

The moral here:
Sometimes you don't have friends because the best one aint around yet. I don't know what kinda stick I had up my backside, but I've never in my life been able to have so much dumb fun with Rikk to hang with.

#7 dragonsdontfly

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Posted 05 April 2012 - 07:14 AM

I speak in past tense because Rikk crashed at 120mph. He'll be alright, but has been to busy with medical bills to talk, even on his silverspoon allowance lol. Anyways, we always said high speed and high volume: Best way to go. But yeah we haven't talked in about a month since he crashed. Waiting to hang out with Dikkolas again lol.

#8 IVIYTH0S

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Posted 05 April 2012 - 11:17 AM

I 3rd the motion for checking out social clubs relative to your interest, the good friends will come back, fickle ones won't

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#9 Stonerboy779

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Posted 05 April 2012 - 11:47 AM

I worked out if you want to keep friends don't ever end up in a relationship with one of your mates sisters.

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#10 wevsspot

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Posted 05 April 2012 - 12:11 PM

hmmm, work and school are usually great places to make contacts that may eventually turn into friendships. I guess if I were you the first thing I'd do is a little self inventory, even if it includes some input from a family member. The first thing you need to do is exclude yourself from being part of the problem. Just a few simple examples of things that might make me avoid a friendship;

mean drunks
people that belittle you or always make you the butt of the joke
body odor
bad breath
laziness
self centered or egotistical
violent
liars
etc.

Now I'm not saying that you have any the traits above, but what I am saying is that the best place to start is a honest assessment of yourself. Many people have mentioned social clubs, I'll take that one step further. Diversify your interests and be willing to try new things. I assume you like computers and online socializing, through choice or not. But not everyone is a computer geek. Since you're still in school surely there are athletic events, campus events, concerts or even faith based organizations if that is your cup of tea. Or you might already have some other hobbies that aren't computer related. Professional sports, hunting, fishing, golfing, playing softball or baseball? If you have any other things that interest you personally get out in the community and try to find like minded individuals.

On an even more personal note GG - you write like you might have some early signs of depression (speaking from experience). And if these general thought patterns persist it might be good to speak with your doctor or other health professional about some of these things and maybe even determine if some AD medication might be appropriate for your condition. Maybe your "old" friends feel like you're always a downer because you suffer from depression?
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#11 Speedway

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Posted 05 April 2012 - 12:24 PM

I think my situation is somewhat unique, I mean I live in a small town inside of a big city (Speedway is located inside the Indianapolis city lines). So although I grew up in a city, Speedway still has a small town feel when it comes to school, friends, ect. My 10 year high school reunion was in 2007, but all of my good friends I graduated with in 97, I still saw all the time even before, not like the reunion was the first time in awhile ;). With a small town, everyone usually remains pretty close, we just happen to be located in a big city as well :) So it's like the best of both worlds. For example, I just had a good friend turn 30 and a lot of people went out to the bars downtown Indy for his bday. I would say out of the 60 or so friends there, the range went from the class of 93' to the class of 2005'. Basically, every time we go out it is like a range of 10+ years high school reunion! I'm pretty lucky, I have a good group of very close friends that I grew up with my whole life and still see all the time! Now, some of them have kids, and our kids play together, will go to school together, so the cycle will probably just repeat itself :biggrin: I mean, my mom still hangs out with all the girls she went to school with at Speedway (class of 74) as well :teehee:

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#12 wevsspot

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Posted 06 April 2012 - 06:26 AM

Speed - are you Irish or Italian? :)
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