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GabrielT

Guys I think I am losing it. Feel free to vent with me.

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One of the ways I've been dealing with everything is by helping people on another forum learn how to build computers and teaching them what parts are compatible/perform best for their situation, etc.

 

I started doing that back in october, and some of the builds that I've planned for people have started to come back with many thanks. It makes me feel good about myself, helping people get the best computer they can for their needs and their money. I've watched the "Technology Discussion" section of the forum develop from endless questions of "What headset is the best?" to questions about the advantages of Solid State drives, watercooling, and requests for help on planning builds and troubleshooting. It's almost half as cool as OCC. In fact, today I helped someone troubleshoot why their computer wouldn't POST after an overclock. He had OC'd the build that I suggested for him (Based on a Phenom II X4) to 4.0 GHz, but couldn't get it stable. He tried to boot with it, and it went to BSOD. After that, it refused to POST. He tried to reset his CMOS by removing the battery, but was too eager and hadn't removed it for long enough. I also helped plan a build for someone with a $700 budget that wanted to play games as well as possible. He was going to buy from IBuyPower, until someone convinced him to send me a message and ask for some help.

 

It's nice to help people learn more, and it's even more fun to see them evolve and become more advanced. I've even been challenged a few times! :)

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I dont think your life is bad at all.

You do study, have work (you will get one better eventualy), you have girlfriend.

The only bad is ADHD. But is not so serious disease. There are lot of people who are suffering terrible diseases.

 

You have love. Count with it when you feel bad and ask supports with your friends. =)

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I know how you feel I have a learning disability which makes it tough to retain information that I learned in class or read

 

I have to spend most days studying even when the exam is weeks away it gets tiring but eventually it gets better schools not forever even if it feels like it.

Edited by fire_storm

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@OP,

Welcome to the Human Race my young friend. You share most likely all the struggles with probably 90% of us working class types. That doesnt make it better or right, just real. Lucky for you that you are young enough to endure. No real advice because there isnt really any escape, just determination and persistence.

 

Hang in there, dont give up! Good luck.

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I have ADHD as well and am also on a daily dose of Adderall XR. 20mg to be exact. Been that way for close to ten years now and I totally know how you feel about it. I'm in the same boat, addy works the best but feels the worst of all of the options. I grew out of the non-stimulant meds a long time ago, but it almost feels like the ADHD just gets worse anyway. I still have a hard time focusing on stuff like conversations with a TV on in the room, but I find the best way to mitigate the issue is to become aware of what your mind does when you stray your attention. For me, it helps me get back to what I should be focusing on quickly, but may not work at all for you. That's the worst part about psychological disorders, treatments vary depending on person and severity. But I'm already going on a tangent lol

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@OP you are doing fine.. You need to keep your chin up. Have you talked with your girlfriend? Have you talked to her what is going on? Talking to her might help.. Have you tried talking to anyone else? So far you are doing a good job on not smoking..

 

 

 

@iskout : You mentioned kids in your post.. are those yours? If you are feeling like depression is getting back up, please see a doctor while you can.. Try to force yourself to go to sleep to go to your 9:00 class. Who told you are not welcome at the house any more? Your girlfriend? Do you still talk to her?

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Well. This thread reminds me all people got highs and downs.

 

Even being the richest guy, with lof of girls, education, and good health may be depressed some days.

I also get depressed some days. But that is life.

 

I can tell you for example Robbie Willams. He is famous, full of money, he can get almost any girl he want, he is healthy, I dont know what is going on but he get depressed and went on drougs. Human is strange. Even dont having a single problem or a perfect life it search for them.

 

There is something I told to myself. Lets forget the bad days and appreciate the good and happy ones =)

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At least it's good to know other people share a similar story.. just keep your head up man.. it's better than it seems

 

It kinda sounds like the thing that gets you most is the money, and the repetitive grind, and I know exactly how that goes.. ya gotta stick it out though man, if ya can't find anything else with better pay while in school then just keep your head above the water and try to do good in school and just know it won't be like that forever.

 

Im guessing with the ADHD it'd be hard to smoke weed every once in a while just for a breather and not get addicted.. I've smoked both wacky and tabaccy and they're really not worth the money unless its once in a blue moon. Ultimately you gotta try to be the best man ya can and try not to fall victim to vice.. In the long run they only really bring you down, but don't be afraid to enjoy them if you're thinking about doing something worse.. Weed or booze is nothing compared to other bad decisions.

But yeah whats the situation with drinking? Any trouble there with binge? Or does it only strengthen problems rather than alleviate?

 

You gotta try to be happy with where you are, of course you'll reach a different destination soon enough, but for now really just try to slow down and focus on things that really make ya happy. Go out with some friends or the girl, get a little goofy, and just sleep it off.

Another thing is just try to laugh man, if you watch TV try to watch something you think is funny, or just mess around with your girl, get a good crackin' going.

 

How about working out? There's ways to get close to the same feeling as being on that bike through exercise.

Running gets me there, for me it's primal.. Running's all about focusing your mindset, just the repetition of focusing on my breath and how my feet land and how I push off, just listening to the beat and thinking to myself "don't stop, just push a little more" breaks me into a trance where the physical pain turns into pleasure and when I stop and cool down it only gets better.. but ultimately any activity that makes you feel free and kind of entrances you will work, right now you have the bike, but there's more ways than one to find that feeling! If it's not through exercising the body than find a way you like to exercise the mind

For more of a "WTF I'm gonna go crazy" moment I usually turn to the punching bag though.. one of the best buys I could of made.

 

Good lucks to ya dude, we're all swimmin' in the same schit..

Edited by TOMisCHEEZE

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School, work, life, rent, girlfriend, ADHD, and I just need to get away.

 

So school is school. I quite frankly can't believe I am passing my classes and feeling as stressed out as I am. I am losing my mind over how much of a load I have this semester. Economics is so hard, I want to pay attention and it actually is interesting to me but I can't focus and I am so frustrated. I don't want to fail another class I love.

 

Work, Pizza Hut pays crap money and gives me the most erratic hours but I can't find a real job and go to school. And people aren't tipping like they used to. I work with a bunch of pot heads and they seem to be so happy and laid back, it makes it hard to not start smoking again. I just know if I do I will lose what little progress I have made in school and I know that I only feel worse when I do.

 

Rent, seriously where the hell does my money go. I get paid, I pay rent and buy food and I work my butt off and I am broke. Always broke.

 

Girlfriend, I love her so much. I feel like I could spend my whole life with her and I plan to. I spend way too much time with her and I don't care. I found the one that makes me happy and I am sane with her. More sane rather. We are actually engaged but I can't afford a ring and I feel worthless.

 

I have ADHD and I hate the way ADHD meds make me feel but I think I really need them. Adderall works the best but it makes me cold and I don't feel like eating. It's speed. Ridilin, it kicks my butt like addy does but I can't focus as well. It makes me shake. The non stimulant ones just make me angry and I don't learn anything.

 

Getting away. I just can't do it. I tried freeing my mind but that really never works out like I want it to.

I am working on my motorcycle and I am almost done. I just want to blast around some rural roads and chase the horizon. It's not the same in a car, or rather a cage. I don't feel free in a car and I never have. I have been riding motorcycles since I was 10 and it's the only thing I can do and not need to think, I can just fly. It makes me happy.

 

 

HAHAHA no offense, your life is almost exactly like mine... Minus the girlfriend at the moment... Pizza Hut is an alright job for me, if your a delivery driver. It pays good money for doing jack .. I am only working a night a week at that job, and I still make about $150+ a night... I have been freaking out myself with school currently, to the point I was having anxiety attacks, where I was in pain everywhere. Didn't leave my bed for two full days... Sometimes stress gets to ya, and I am working on ways to try and vent that stress. The best thing I have found is to make time for yourself. Just sleep, watch a movie or something, when your constantly busy and all over the place like many of us young folk are, we often forget that our bodies need proper rest...

 

 

You will be fine, just relax...

 

 

btw ADHD is a joke. The doctors said I had it, even institutionalized me for that along w/ depression back when I was a kid. Eventually I told them to F off that I was just a kid living life like a kid. In todays world we get distracted easily, look at all the toys we have... Sometimes the best thing to fix that is to spend some time in the library working on your work each week. Thats when I get the most done. I get jack . done at my desk these days...

 

 

 

Put it this way your life isn't that bad, I am a 24 year old college junior. I still live at home with my folks. I work at Pizza Hut part time just like you. I have another job that is an internship/help thing where I am helping a company one day a week, for very very small pay for what I am doing. I don't have a girlfriend... I want to get the hell out of this house, but I cant afford it...

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I have ADHD as well and am also on a daily dose of Adderall XR. 20mg to be exact. Been that way for close to ten years now and I totally know how you feel about it. I'm in the same boat, addy works the best but feels the worst of all of the options. I grew out of the non-stimulant meds a long time ago, but it almost feels like the ADHD just gets worse anyway. I still have a hard time focusing on stuff like conversations with a TV on in the room, but I find the best way to mitigate the issue is to become aware of what your mind does when you stray your attention. For me, it helps me get back to what I should be focusing on quickly, but may not work at all for you. That's the worst part about psychological disorders, treatments vary depending on person and severity. But I'm already going on a tangent lol

 

I have to doodle. If I start drifting off I need to do something to keep me partly occupied if I am drifting off into adhd land and doodling doesn't disturb others. I try my hardest to listen. I haven't taken any ADHD meds in over a year and I do like myself more off them.

 

To everyone else. Thank you so much for the support. I was having a bit of a meltdown last night. I talked to the girlfriend and she gave me the biggest hug ever.

 

I did manage to find a cigarette last night too and that calmed me down a lot. I had to make a cigarette actually, I remembered that I had some old dry TOP tobacco and some papers and tadaa! One nasty dry non filtered cigarette. Tasted like a tool box lol.

 

I <3 OCC

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We're here for ya! I was down in a rut a couple of weeks ago, and I thought of changing majors, AGAIN. I won't though, I know I can be proud of myself as long as I work towards things with my 100%.

 

I was about to turn down the News Editor job here but I know that if I keep working hard at different things I'll be more well rounded and I want to give back to this great community!!

 

If you ever need to talk, we'll lend you our ears and trade tales of what's getting us down.

 

I for one wouldn't mind a g/f right now :rolleyes:

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