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revised! - Make Momma a Sig (aka "The Momma & Angry Show&q


momma

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Well i do enjoy the blond that is currently my sig but it makes me look rather dumb which i try not to be. :) Try being the key work there. Anyways i really like hockey, Avs and Devils are my teams and i like pretty much like anything. See this is why i give this job to you guys so i don't have to think about it. Whip something up. I do like the "dummies" one too. Maybe i will just have several and change them weekly :).

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  • 2 months later...

so it has been a couple of months...and the writing bug is coming out again (i know ive been quiet around here for a while...).

 

ive decided to punish you all a bit for a minute or three, depending on how long your attention span is.

 

I must say that there's been over 500 that have read this little "momma & angry" dialogue, both here, at the amdmb forums, and from a few games that we play online (notably Eve-online).

 

Women find it to be the truth. And guys find it to be almost religious. Personally I think they are sniffing airplane glue, but then I remember that women are women, and men are men...and with a few exceptions, the rules are pretty much set in stone.

 

but I digress, as we have had a few more episodes, and now I am feeling again like having a personality so I thought I would share some over the next few days...

 

 

Angry gains a lifetime partner

 

 

me: man...are these people stupid?

 

momma: man...are these people stupid?

 

me: STOP DOING THAT

 

momma: doing what?

 

me: thinking same damn thing I am thinking, or saying it almost same time I do!!!

 

momma: does it...SCAAAAARE you?

 

me: god yer freaky sometimes

 

momma: hahahaha. We are like two peas in a pod. Admit it, you love me!

 

me:

 

momma: hahaha, like starsky and hutch, like bacon and eggs, like the Lakers and choking

 

me: no...we are like a matched pair of memory sticks.

 

momma:

 

me: wtf? wtf?

 

momma: that is the MOST BEAUTIFUL thing I have ever heard!!!

 

me:

 

 

moral of this story? Now she goes around and advertises her uber geekdom with this little story. Tho bits of it might change, the whole 'we are like matched pair of memory sticks' thing is always the end result...and non-nerds look at us (HER) clueless as dirt...and nerdy geek guy friends whistle to themselves and say 'holy crap that guy is like the Fonze man!' and nerdy ubergeek girls break out in tears and they have a good cry session.

 

ok well mebbe not that last bit. Girls never act the same around us as they do themselves. But being men, we like to believe they cry together then talk about what great staminas we have as lovers.

 

*aheM*

 

 

 

Numbers Game

 

then not too long later...we end up with this conversation, while playing our favorite MMOG, Eve: The Second Genesis, in one of the chats:

 

 

SomeGuy: man, my computer is a real junker! it barely plays Eve!

 

KnowItAllJerk: thas cuz yer uber-weak rig isnt l33t like my 12Tiggahertz 1Bigglebyte master box with a super-l55t Nvidia 99999GT-Ultra

 

momma: oh god here we go again

 

me: what now? (cuz im busy KILLING STUFF WOMAN LEAVE ME ALONE!!!)

 

momma: oh some knowitalljerk is carrying on about how his computer is so much better than anyone else's

 

me: oh man this guy IS a knowitalljerk!

 

SomeGuy: wow! really! your comp is all that and more!??

 

KnowItAllJerk: ya man no one can top my rig. Yours sux0rz bad cuz its a piece of moldy dung crap that died and then died again you LOOOOOOSER

 

momma: oh no no let me let me!!! I know this stuff remember!

 

me: oh god no no no no NINERS.

 

momma: no no really! You know ive learned so much from being with you! Im interested! I know this stuff! Let me flame him plz plz plz plz

 

me: YOU DONT EVEN KNOW WHAT IS IN YOUR COMPUTER!!!

 

momma: Oh yes i do smartass.

 

me: then what is it?

 

momma: its a computer!

 

me: im ignoring you now

 

momma: no no. Its a.........................Pentium right?

 

me:

 

momma: .....pentium 4! DFI motherboard!

 

me: hardly tough on the motherboard part eh? since we have NOTHING BUT DFI BOARDS STACKED IN THE HOUSE!!!

 

momma: and it its...fast!

 

me: god woman...you dont even know what is in it!!!

 

momma: 9800Pro!!! hahahahahaha I know that one!!!

 

me: lucky guess

 

momma: no i told you. i know this stuff now...so get out of my way

 

me: you DONT KNOW YOU JUST GUESSING!!!!

 

momma: i know!

 

me: you dont!

 

 

momma: dammit I KNOW WHATS IN THERE!

 

me: then what else is in there? what type of memory and how much? speed, brand, size?

 

momma:

 

me: hahahaha thats what I though

 

momma: TWO STICKS!

 

me: ? what?

 

momma: ive got two sticks!

 

me: hahahahahahahahahha

 

momma: I HAVE TWO STICKS OF MEMORY

 

me: but what kind is it?

 

momma: its MEMORY DAMN YOU

 

me: but what kind is it?

 

momma: 2 sticks?

 

me: what brand? what speed? what size modules?

 

momma: TWO STICKS TWO STICKS TWO STICKS TWO STICKS

 

 

me: but what speed? how many megabytes?

 

momma: uh...a google? TWO STICKS TWO STICKS TWO STICKS

 

 

 

 

and so this goes for 10 minutes, and we never did bother to show KnowItAll jerk who really knew their computers the best...cuz momma ultimately wins hands down.

 

problem is now...she thinks that is the answer for everything that requires a specific number, speed, whatever. Niner is still the 'i dont know but ill make you feel like a stupid Star-Trek booger-eating geek for trying to outnerd me or your dumb friends' word.

 

Two Sticks is now her way of saying "dont make me feel stupid because I will cut things off you in the middle of the night"

 

 

I've got some more, but I will save it, and besides, i have to go sleep a little...and hope I wake up before she reads this as I dont like waking up missing pieces of myself...

 

me: what? why are....what...sheets....sticky...

 

momma: remember something called the forums? where you like to write stories?

 

me: call 911

 

momma: call them yourself...oh wait...you cant mwahahaahaahAHAHAHAHAHAHA.....

 

more later!?

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Originally posted by momma

unfortunatly very very true.

 

Angry has been given a gift from god :D

 

Wish a girl around here knew half as much as you do. LOL :P

 

momma: .....pentium 4! DFI motherboard!

 

me: hardly tough on the motherboard part eh? since we have NOTHING BUT DFI BOARDS STACKED IN THE HOUSE!!!

 

Awesome :D

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