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Black64

Movie Concept (final part up)

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I don't like writing, but I do like movies. I just had an idea for a movie and I just kinda kept adding to it. So I decided to write it down and see what anyone thinks about it. I like movies where you need to think, like inception and RED. So here goes, It's more of summary, not a script or book. Just wanted to share the beginning and see if it's good or not. Thanks for reading! :thx: I would like to write a book one day, if this is good maybe it will be about this story.

 

The innocence project

 

A man wakes up, his wife is next to him, still sleeping. He appears to be late 30s, early 40s. He gets up, goes to the gym and begins his morning job. It's implied he is in law enforcement of some type. He arrives home at around 9am from his jog, his wife is making breakfast. She looks uninterested, not caring. Glances at him and says hi softly. He doesn't really notice, his more of a tough guy. He says hi back, and they chat a bit. He grabs his badge and gets in his sports car to work. He's a Federal investigator, he is second in command. A pro, he's been at it for years and was once a navy seal.

 

He working a case about man who died by falling into a subway train, he's not sure if it was a murder or suicide. It's about noon and he is on his way to the evidence room, when his boss comes running toward him. 

 

His wife has been murdered.

 

He arrives in tears at the crime scene, one bullet, one kill. A few witnesses, but no one saw a shooter or heard a gunshot. There is only 2 pieces of evidence at the scene.

 

A card with some numbers printed on it.  -1 +1

 

and the bullet.

 

After a few days of grieving, he returns to work and continues on his original case. He enters the evidence room and pulls out the file. To his shock there is only piece of evidence in the file.

A card with some numbers printed on it. -1 +128

 

He is excited and in shock, unsure of what to make of this. Are this connected? What should I do? Who else knows? He continues on the case, he examines more into it and find out on the mans body they found weapons, and they assumed he was going to attack the train, but his death stopped this horrible attack. 

 

He's wondering how anyone could have known. and why was his wife killed? 

 

Well it's been a week since his wife was killed and he's going through her personal items for the funeral. The only thing that's left is a picture in her closet. He removes it and to his surprise finds a safe in the wall. He had never even known it was there. He calls a lock smith and has it opened.

 

Inside he finds a gun, some bullets and note. A note that's tells how she was planing to kill her husband and then kill herself. He thinks to himself. -1 +1, whoever it was killed her to save him, but why? 

 

Then he reviews the footage from the subway, the man fell, but it looked more like he passed out. Did he faint? He rewinds the tape. The man was drinking a water, he rewinds it more, we see a man drop something into the water. Finally a break in the case, they see the killers face.

 

He is able to identify the man and arrest him (more could be done here). He begins questioning him as to why. He tells him he was hired by a group called the innocence project. A secretive group that only texted him. The man tells them he got a text about what to do and where, and was wired money as payment. The man says he was only contacted once and they told him he was only to have job and they would never speak to him again. He knows nothing about his wife's murder. 

 

He walks out of the room and receives a text, the sender, "the innocence project"

 

And that's as much as I would like to write for now, if you guys like it I can continue. Thanks for reading this far.

Edited by Black64

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Interesting start of a story line.  I actually read through the whole thing - unusual for me, so consider that a win  :)

 

I find it intriguing that someone who "doesn't like to write" is working on a screen play or might be interested in writing a book........  Both of those require writing  :)  Or at least typing.

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Well I like being a little creative, so I thought I would just type it up quick. :teehee:  I will post up the next part soon.

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I rather enjoyed that. Seems like some one else on here wrote a book a while back, i have it on my hdd somewhere.

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Here is the next part of the story. This is where the story gets more complex, but I am not sure how complex to make it, as there is a few ideas I had for this part. enjoy.

 

Looking down at his phone. He is unsure what to do, somewhat shocked. How did they get my phone is his first though, yet if they could have known that my wife was planning to kill me, they could get my number. Should I open the text?

 

The text reads "You have questions, we have answers. If you want the answers, accept the package that will arrive at your door tomorrow at 8:30am. If you do not, you will never hear from us again. We will not harm you, if you decline."

 

Unsure of what this could mean. He doesn't tell anyone, after all it is his investigation. He could always use more answers. Plus he knew if they wanted him dead, he would be dead.

 

Tomorrow, 8:30am, the UPS delivers a package, the usual driver delivers it. Nothing out of the ordinary so far. No return address, of course.

 

Being careful, he opens the package. It's a laptop. He plugs it in and it boots. No OS, no boot, just a DOS like interface. 

 

There is a message already sent to him. "When you read this, ask your first question."

 

He types in, "who are you?"

 

"We are the innocence project, we are everywhere and nowhere"

 

"How did you know my wife would kill me and herself?"

 

"She had a blog, in it, she recently wrote about suicide and you. Then she made a rough draft about the note on her phone" The day before she texted some friends goodbye. That's when we made our move. We hired a associate to handle the messy details. We ourselves are not killers, but we have friends."

 

"Why did you not kill me, I guess you could say you saved me"

 

"We need your help"

 

"With what?"

 

"You will find out in time, but right now is not the right time, keep the laptop, it will beep when we are calling. Goodbye"

 

Thinking to himself, this must be some group of hackers, but why do they need me? When do they want me to help them? And with what?

 

He continues thinking to himself. Well this people know what there doing, I could take this into the lab and see if they can trace it, but they probably don't want me finding them. Maybe I should play along, see where this goes. They did tell me why they killed my wife. 

 

He decided to play along and resumes the case, knowing that he can still find their "friends" as they must be a different group. A group of hired hitmen. Still, it doesn't all fit, hackers working with hitmen? But are they working for good..or evil? One thing he knows for sure is the hackers are paying the hitmen, so they must be funded by someone. He pulls out his phone to write that down, thinking that maybe a bad idea, he writes it down on a notepad instead.

 

The next day

 

He returns the office and on his desk sits a folder of cases, new cases. His boss comes in and closes his office door. He tells him all these cases have one thing in common. On each victim body or around the crime scene was found a card. Always with -1 and + some other number. In most cases a larger number.

 

There must be at least 50 cases on his desk....

 

EDIT - fixing grammer

Edited by Black64

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I would read a book or watch a movie with this story line. I like the idea.

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Thanks guys, that means a lot. Well I worked on the next bit for about an hour last night and got pretty far. Hope you like it.

 

 

He sits down, in a mild panic as to what he is seeing. His boss says there is one more thing. He says your going to need some help with these. He is assigning him a new partner. His partner's name is Jack, he is quite new to the force, he has been a investigator for about a year. Since last week he has been assigned to working on his wife's murder case, but since all of these cases must be connected he is now helping him. With the much bigger scale of things.

 

His Boss leaves and about 15min later there is knock at is office door. his new partner arrives. They greet each other. They have known each other for about a year. They get along fine, but they have different tactics to solving case, something that may work to there advantage, but also be a source of disagreement.

 

He knows he must isolate one case and focus on it. He sifts though the stack of papers on his desk. All the cases seem the same, one person killed. Then an odd case. This one had card left the scene with -3 +1. Strange. The only case he has seen with 3 kills and one person saved, as he is lead to believe. He and his partner start there...

 

The crime scene is about a hour away, the killings happened about 2 days ago, not the latest case, but also not the oldest one. The 3 men were killed by gunshots to the head. They where living in a small house, just on the outskirts of town. No signs of forced entry or shots though a window. All of the doors where locked from the inside. A difficult but not impossible murder. What was found in the house was more interesting then the murder...

 

Inside was found of the tools and equipment needed to kidnap and ransom a person. Not many clues as to who though. The ransom note was half done. It read

 

We have him and if you want him back, bring 5 million cash to the.....

 

It was unfinished. something was a miss, whoever killed this men also took a few items with them. There looked to be a few item missing. On a page that had the entire plan the name of the kidnap victim was cut out of the paper. Who ever did this didn't want the anyone to know who they where protecting. Not much else was left at the crime scene. Although there was one thing... Each of the three men had worked at high end investment firm called Glass Investments, they each were laid off around the same time. The man they worked for was worth millions.

 

He says to his partner, let's have talk with there old employer. By now it was late in the day and they had scheduled a appointment to meet with Glass Investments the next day at 10:30 in the morning.

 

It's 7:30am, the next day. He is awaken by a beeping sound. The laptop.

 

He fumbles though the dark and opens the laptop. A message appears on the screen.

 

"Good Morning. Now is the time."

 

He responds. "The time for what?"

 

"The time for you to complete your job."

 

"What job?"

 

"It's up to, you may do what you wish, but all you need to do is look at this file." 

 

A icon pops up and starts flashing on screen. He clicks it.

 

In the file it shows video, sound, text messages, bank account numbers and emails all relating to the murder of his wife. The name of the killer is what nearly stuns him cold. 

 

His Boss

 

Shocked, outraged and yet calm. He goes into work at 8:30. His sees his Boss in his office. He approaches  cold and calm. He walks though the door and closes it behind him. He pulls out his gun and points it at his boss. He Boss yells what are doing and pulls out his own gun. They both look at each other. Both shocked, yet they both knew what was coming.

 

He tells his boss what he knows, his has evidence that proofs he killed his wife. His Boss looks at him and says nothing, then asks him how he got it. 

 

Not important he says, but I am not going to kill you, he lowers his gun. I am going to arrest you for what you have done.

 

His Boss says, you should have killed me when you had the... BANG! the window behind his boss breaks, a bullet to the back of his head kills his boss instantly.

 

He quickly glaces out the window, the shooter about 6 blocks away is running down a car parking garage. He jumps into action. Races out the the building and a chase ensues. With in 2 mins he catches the sniper. Maybe a little to easy.

 

He arrives back at his office, police everywhere, his team on high alert. He walks into his office and closes his door. Still in mild shock from the events that happened.

 

His phones beeps, a text.

 

The text reads, "when you get home open the laptop."

 

He rushes home

 

The laptop still on his desk, right where he left it.

 

The message reads.

 

"Congratulations you passed the test."

 

"What test?"

 

"We gave you the motivation to kill your boss, but you didn't. You have the right morals and conscience, something your boss didn't and now he's dead. We knew only one of you would walk out of his office alive today. The better man did."

 

"Why test me?"

 

"Because your now the new chief of the FBI and we have one final job for you."

 

 

And that's it for today, I think there will only be one, maybe 2 parts left. Most of the ending is still rough, but I should finish it by Friday. Look back then for the ending!

 

Thanks for reading!

 

EDIT - Grammer fixes

Edited by Black64

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Hmm. Interesting twist. I think it would have to be fleshed out a bit, maybe he works on some of the cases getting no where then the laptop beeps. As it is its kinda a jump. You need to build the tension.

But overall i'm rather liking it.

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Hmm. Interesting twist. I think it would have to be fleshed out a bit, maybe he works on some of the cases getting no where then the laptop beeps. As it is its kinda a jump. You need to build the tension.

But overall i'm rather liking it.

I know what you mean by having him work more on the cases, but I don't want to make it boring. There are so many CSI shows out there, there is very little original material I could make. But I could add a few more case details into the story line though. The final part or two will be much longer then these first 3 parts, so it will get much more tension. trust me. :evilgrin:

 

But any ideas for adding suspense are welcomed. :thx:

Edited by Black64

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Hmm. Interesting twist. I think it would have to be fleshed out a bit, maybe he works on some of the cases getting no where then the laptop beeps. As it is its kinda a jump. You need to build the tension.

But overall i'm rather liking it.

I know what you mean by having him work more on the cases, but I don't want to make it boring. There are so many CSI shows out there, there is very little original material I could make. But I could add a few more case details into the story line though. The final part or two will be much longer then these first 3 parts, so it will get much more tension. trust me. :evilgrin:

 

But any ideas for adding suspense are welcomed. :thx:

 

The degree to which you need moe in these first parts will depend upon the last parts. The part your jsut finished left me feeling we were quite near then end, it may not need as much as i think once i have read the whole thing.

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