Week #2: news, notes & smack

[Angry_Games]

So here we are again in week #2. I'll start with my own demise since we all expected it at some point, why not make it against the Trooper, the guy I derided about his bench outscoring his starters last week. Seems fitting enough.

 

My only hope was that Westbrook, my Monday night spare, would score 42 points. Of course the Eagles got whipped pretty good, but I watched about half of it on-and-off, and my boy did quite well. Of course it would seem that the Trooper had all the right pieces in this week, and even if he didn't, his bench scored more than enough to make me eat my past words! If Arizona and Houston can do well, Trooper might win the league. But we all know that I must be on crack to think either team will win more than 4 games, perennial losers that they are. I have no room to talk since 90% of my team is loser no-names or 3rd stringers lol.

 

 

Mr. Smackrapist put up another strong week, thanks to Grandpa not rupturing his spleen trying to put on his helmet in the locker room. A balanced all-around game gave the pale cabanaphile the win rather easily, as this was never even close.

 

The Infektion has a killer defense in the Bears, and of course he has Mr. Jesus Reborn (Tom Brady) who could make an interception into a positive game-winning event somehow. The Infektor will remain a strong team with a great running back from the Pats, as well as two extremely strong receivers who might have an occasional low-output day, but for the most part will get a lot of touches and more than a few touchdowns.

 

 

 

This has to be the funniest game of the week. The old man talked a rare but brilliant game of smack to the Goob, only to be slaughtered most of the game. While the soundman put up a good fight finally, I laughed all day remembering all the smack I laughed at aimed at Ace as Goob dropped bomb after bomb on the old man's wheelchair.

 

This is probably going to be even funnier as knowing Ace, he'll use the opportunity to rub the smack in the Quackers' face. The Ducks won't take kindly to it I'm sure, but at least the Chuckers have until Saturday to make sure Soundx98 remembers what humble pie tastes like!

 

 

Let's talk about the Pitchfork... He traded yawns with the Corpsemaker all game long. Talk about a sleeper haha. I had to keep looking at their teams to make sure they actually put players into the game!

 

Hopefully the Saints can figure out how to win some games or Cadaver is going to be chasing a lot of opponents this season. Negative points for a defense can never be a good thing. It's odd for the fact that Nawlins' usually has a stout, or at least effective defense. Reggie Bush needs to pick it up, though that will only help Cadaver in a secondary fashion, and probably won't help the hapless defense at all.

 

Pitchfork on the other hand, has a pretty damn strong team. You could say week #2 was just a fluke of sorts, and if I'm his head coach, I'm damn sure putting Fred Taylor in over Chris Brown in most games, though it can be hard to decide with the plethora of #1 running backs he has in his arsenal. He might also want to decide that Buffalo really stinks and Falcons do to, but at least the Falcons play better defense (and at least the Falcons can score a touchdown once a week).

 

 

 

Anyone who had some Cleveland and Cinnci players this week saw something probably never seen before by humans...both teams, and their players, dropping the points bomb left and right. Sure we are all used to both teams' defense laying down for everyone, but I don't think we were quite ready for the offensive explosion that the game ended up as. This is probably the only time during the season I'm going to wish I had the NFL package on DirecTV, as I couldn't get this game, but I watched the ticker like a hawk just because of how back-and-forth the scoring seemed to be.

 

Jake D and Garcia both score big? Heck, who needs those guys when the Quackers have Carson Palmer who threw for like...12,323 yards on Sunday. If only Reggie Bush could figure out where he's running to, the Quacks would have two excellent rushers to go along with 3 starting quarterbacks.

 

The Smashers smelled like New Jersey most of the day, but only because the Attack was fueled by Cinci/Cleveland rage. With a guy like Manning and Ravens (and Cowboys!) defense, and a jackass-but-still-great receiver like TO, the Atlantic City Smasha's will continue to be a force to be reckoned with. The weak bench though will mean his starters have to play strong every week, but at least he has a good backup defense.

 

 

This week's barn-burner had to be the Crooked Teeths vs the Chubby Sisters. It seemed like this game was about 50-40 within 4 minutes after kickoff on Sunday and it never let up. Unfortunately for the Fish-n-Chips, it paid to have a receiver with gold teeth from Cincinnati, as he was most definitely the deciding factor for the Big Boned kids. And the guy can dance, that's worth some points, ain't it?

 

Both of these teams are pretty well stocked with good players, and both have a serious bench that can be mean to opponents. The Nannies' bench wasn't worth mentioning this week, but just looking at the names on the jerseys gives you a bit of a chill if you have to face them, as just about every one of them is capable of putting on a Chad Johnson day if the moon and the planets are aligned just right (usually the week you have to play them haha).

 

 

 

The Teachers lectured their way into a strong win this week. Almost from the get-go they took the lead and never really looked back. A few roster changes and the Zeros could have had the win, especially with the Hags getting stuck with the NY Giants defense. Galloway probably saved the day for the Trashy Teachers. The O's made it close at the end with a Vikings defense that figured out how to tackle someone, but it wasn't enough against an emerging Tony Romo as well as a Pittsburgh team that found a running game that worked.

 

Nero better get a win before Rome burns all the way down. 0-2 isn't a proper way for a Hero to conquer territory. Keeping a Buffalo receiver in the game while a Jacksonville receiver is drinking Gatorade on the sidelines is tanamount to playing the fiddle while everything goes up in flames!

 

 

 

The Bacon is sizzling in the pan with a second consecutive win this week. The Dawgs couldn't have put together a better game, but once again, a Cleveland/Cincinnati player was the deciding factor. No real help from the bench could have swayed this game either, the starters gave it their all, and it was a hard-fought battle, but in the end, that damned Cincinnati thing got in the way.

 

The Bacon bench is pretty thin, but the Dawgs need to check Rhodes' condition and pick up a free agent that will at least sit on the bench with his playing pads on. It's never good to hold onto a player that is Out for more than a week or two, even if it a first string points getter. There just aren't enough weeks in a football year to hang onto a guy who gets you zero points for sure when you could at least take a chance with a 3rd stringer who might get his cleats on the turf once a week.

 

 

 

 

 

Which brings me to this week's words of wisdom to some of you rookie players who are new at the fantasy thing:

 

Angry's Top 2 Rules:

 

1. watch injury reports...like a hawk. As mentioned, an injury lasting 3+ weeks could devastate your chances of winning more than a game or two if it's a starter. An injury lasting 4+ weeks for a mostly-bench player can be just as bad. Which brings me to point #2

 

2. keep an eye out on the available free agents! If you have a position that is pretty weak on picking up points, go shopping in the free agent pool to see if there's another player at that position that is available that is doing something other than snoozing on your sidelines (or worse, dropping balls or fumbling!). Most of the best (starters) are already on a team, but there's always a few gems left that are rookies, or sleepers finally having a good year, or just good guys that are finally on a decent team that lets them touch the ball regularly.

 

 

Fantasy Football is especially tough because it's just one game a week, and only 13 weeks. Every single week counts, and losing two games in a row can almost put you out of playoff contention with no chance of recovering.

 

Being a spoiler and knocking someone else out of the playoffs after you've already been knocked out is also a lot of fun (for you haha, not the guy you dumped!), but it isn't nearly as much fun as winning enough to knock other teams out while you are headed down playoff road.

 

While I haven't decided on prizes, I can assure you they will be worthy of your efforts to make the playoffs and continue winning. But winning means paying attention to your team, as well as their real-life counterparts (players and teams), and asking for some help if you still haven't quite got the hang of it yet.

 

Besides, who wants to be the butt of Angry's weekly column? Only the losers get that honor, though calling it an honor is about like getting a sharp stick in the eye and a blue ribbon for best eye-gouge

 

[njswift10141980]

great write-up AG, I think I gotta make some changes, maybe sit manning to teach him a lesson.

[Guest InFeKtioN]

"Very Nice ...... how much ?"

 

Borat

[soundx98]

The Aceman cometh!

Lord what a beating.

I thought McNabb might be my hero and get me 20 points on Monday but he needs Geritol more than I do

I worked real hard on the SmackTalk (probably the most fun part of the week) but Ace wasn't even fazed.

Great write up Travis (it was the second best part of the week).

[red930]

Yet again another excellent write-up! Great job Travis.

 

Carl, I'm not going to say a word. I'll let the title under my name do all the talking.

[Angry_Games]

great write-up AG, I think I gotta make some changes, maybe sit manning to teach him a lesson.

 

Manning isn't a guy you want on the bench. He's going to be good no matter how his team does..it's the little things you got to look for (WR, TE, etc) to make up a few points here and there.

 

 

Ace: hahahahahaha...awesome user title.

[njswift10141980]

Manning isn't a guy you want on the bench. He's going to be good no matter how his team does..it's the little things you got to look for (WR, TE, etc) to make up a few points here and there.

 

 

Ace: hahahahahaha...awesome user title.

 

Yeah I had no intentions of sitting him, I may talk to myself from time to time but I'm not dumb enough to sit him.

[red930]

great write-up AG, I think I gotta make some changes, maybe sit manning to teach him a lesson.

 

Won't matter what you do son, you're goin down this week as Favre humiliates the Chargers even more so than the Patriots did. Yes, by himself he will be more dominating than the entire Patriots team.

 

Move aside and let a real challenger step up.

:tooth:

[njswift10141980]

Won't matter what you do son, you're goin down this week as Favre humiliates the Chargers even more so than the Patriots did. Yes, by himself he will be more dominating than the entire Patriots team.

 

Move aside and let a real challenger step up.

:tooth:

 

we'll see, but I think favre will have the look of your cartoon favre when he hits the chargers d, I got manning tearing up the texans' d and my ravens d killing the cards.

[red930]

we'll see, but I think favre will have the look of your cartoon favre when he hits the chargers d, I got manning tearing up the texans' d and my ravens d killing the cards.

 

Texans are a traditionally tough team for Manning - plus the Colts seem to only play just above the level of their opposition.

 

Ravens don't have nearly as good a pass protection and 'zona doesn't really have a run game so that could be interesting.

 

Sadly, I need Payton and the Ravens D to do well in another league, this is the team I'm up against (scored 210 pts last week) :

 

Carson Palmer

Frank Gore

Derrick Ward

Chris Brown

Chad Johnson

Atwaan Randle El

Antonio Gates

Vikings D (avg 54.5 pts in that league)

 

Granted, the league is small, so I've got this (170 last week):

 

Tom Brady

Steven Jackson

Adrian Peterson (the good one, not the Bears one)

Rudi Johnson

Reggie Wayne (hence the need for Payton)

Houshmandzadeh (split on the Palmer thing..)

Dallas Clark (Payton again, assuming the seafood from U of Iowa can play with a busted neck)

Ravens D

 

*sigh*

 

This sucks my soul away.

 

Anyways, other than Favre and LJ playing a good team (but not that great a defense in Favre's case, LJ is probably gonna be shut down for a 3rd week ), everybody else I've got is playing pretty weak teams. Could get interesting, but I'm goin 3-0 dammit!

 

These next couple weeks are gonna be a real show of Favre's game this year, after the Chargers this week he's got the Vikings then the Bears all in a row. Vikings don't have very good pass defense (look at the Lions game) but they'll be more prepared come next week. Bears also aren't that great on the pass ('cept for Hester) but they have their gay-butt Bears luck that ALWAYS kicks in. Favre could throw for 600 yards and Grossman for 50 but the luck factor would give Rex the edge. God I hate the Bears.

[soundx98]

Just so you know Ace, I LET YOU WIN!

Just felt so friggin sorry for you I told Donovan to throw the game

[red930]

Just so you know Ace, I LET YOU WIN!

Just felt so friggin sorry for you I told Donovan to throw the game

 

 

Haha, Yeah, Right.

 

If your players would have stopped doing so much "McLovin" amongst themselves and concentrated on the game then you probably would have won.