Jump to content

Amusing Computer Support Stories


SeanDude05

Recommended Posts

I've decided to create a thread for sharing our funny and amusing Computer and Tech Support Stories. Please don't flame, and don't include any names.

 

Them: My coffee holder closed last night when I turned off my computer, and I think some spilled on it because it wont open anymore.

Me: What does this have to do with your PC?

Them: You know... the coffee holder on the front of the computer, with the open and close button...

Me: ... [sigh]

 

or

 

Them: My computer wont turn on anymore, it keeps saying Non System Disk!

Me: Eject the floppy disk.

Them: Your so smart!

 

Also one from my cousin:

Me: What graphics card do you have?

Him: Its a Geforce.

Me: You narrowed down half of the graphics cars ever made, do you know the model number?

Him: I think theres a 4 in it somewhere...

 

 

 

What funny exerpts or stories do you guys have?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

  • Replies 55
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Guest Bulldog

Them: Hi I'm having trouble installing the drivers from the support CD

Me: In that case could you please boot to desktop and either try installing them manually from the root directory or from the auto-menu.

Them: I have the disk in the drive but I can't access it.

Me (suspicious): Have you booted to desktop?

Them: No. I'm here in the BIOS now at the screen showing the CD-ROM and I can't access the disk.

Me: That not the way it works you need to boot to desktop and then install the drivers.

Them: But if I try and boot that way all I get is a screen saying "No Bootable drive or something"

Me (more suspicious): You do have the OS installed right?

Them: Do I need to have the OS installed to install drivers? I thought I could do the drivers first.

Me: ..................................-------Sigh--------

 

This really did happen

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Guest Bulldog

Them: Hi my system doesn't boot anymore and I'm not sure what is wrong.

(Insert several Q&A sessions)

Me: It kinda looks like your board isn't getting any power.

Them: Did I forget to mention that just before all this started smoke came out of the power supply?

Me: Well that would be the problem then. Get that PSU replaced.

Them: Why should I? It's brand new and I just can't imagine how a bit of smoke coming out of the PSU could cause this problem.

Me: ............................

 

Another true story.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Guest Bulldog

Them: Hi I just bought one of your videocards and I think it's faulty.

Me: Please describe the problem.

Them: Every once in a while I get distortion on the screen. Like if the frequency is set wrong.

Me: Hmm sounds like the screen might be getting interference from another device. Do you have a mobile phone anywhere near the monitor?

Them: No

Me: Is the monitor perhaps plugged into the same wall socket as an old refrigerator?

Them: No, but I think I see where you are going. Come to think of it I live sandwiched between a high power submarine antenna and an RAF airbase. Any chance this could have something to do with it.

Me: Oh my......................................

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Guest Bulldog

Them: Your MB is faulty as it won't boot.

Me: Ok lets go over you basic peripherals and see if everything is in place. CPU?

Them: In place.

Me: Memory?

Them: Installed.

Me: Videocard?

Them: Check.

Me: Power supply?

Them: Roger.

Me: HD

Them: No I don't need one.

Me: Eh? Sorry, but you won't get to far without an HD.

Them: I think your company is guilty of false advertising. It says right on the box that it supports Win XP. It should already been installed in the BIOS.

Me: Sir, you had better sit down as this next part might come as a bit of a shock............................

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

...

XX:I can't print.

me:What was the last thing you did before it stopped working.

XX:I went lunch, and when I came back it didn't work.

me:So it worked before you left and didn't when you came back? But nobody has access to your office!?

XX:Oh, I did move my desk across the room.

me:What did you do with the cables when you moved the desk?

XX:Cables?

me:You know the ones that connect your workstation to the power and the network.

XX:What's a workstation? My desk? My desk doesn't need power.

me:No, your computer is a workstation, since that's where you do your work.

XX:I don't know about any cables.

me:Go to the back of the computer and follow the cables, are they all plugged in on both ends?

XX: (5 minutes later) Nevermind.

me:Nevermind? Why was something unplugged?

XX:No I cut the printer cable with the desk leg.

me:So why nevermind?

XX:It's not that important.

me:You are in accounting, right?

XX:Yes...

me:So how will you do payroll without a printer?

XX: Oh ...

me:Just unplug the old printer cable, and grab a new one from Dave at the front desk, he should have one.

XX: Dave who?

me:The guy you pass every morning when you walk into the office.

...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

a friend of mine at college knows just enough about computers to make himself very dangerous. he bought a new case for his computer, and in the process of transferring his mobo to the new case, didnt use the risers for the mobo tray. he couldnt get the plastic back open, so he just said "screw it" and bolted the mobo directly to the metal mobo tray. ten minutes later, he pressed the power button and totally fried his mobo and cpu...

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

(my computer got screwed and so I called sony support)

 

Automatic thingy: If you need support on a Desktop, say "Desktop PC"

Me: Desktop PC

Automatic thingy: I'm sorry, I didn't catch what you said. If you nee...

Me: DESKTOP PC!!!

Automatic thingy: Did you say "Desktop PC"?

Me: YES!

Automatic thingy: OK, next i'm going to have to have you find the model number, it should be located on the back of your computer.

*I find it*

Me: PCV-RS2210

Automatic thingy:I'm sorry, did you mean PCV-RS210

Me: No...

Automatic thingy: OK, next i'm going to have to have you find the model number, it should be located on the back of your computer.

Me: PCV-RS2210

Automatic thingy: I'm sorry, did you mean PCV-RS210

Me: NO!!!

Automatic thingy: Please wait while I transfer you to someone who can help you.

 

3 days later

 

Lady: Name?

Me: (I tell her)

Lady: Modle Number?

Me: PCV-RS2210

Lady: That is not in our database, we have a PCV-RS210

*I look again*

Me: Nope, it's right here in grey and white - PCV-RS2210

Lady: Check the start menu and click "VAIO System Information"

Me: ...............PCV-RS210 wtf POS

 

Just pissed me off, and i'm guessing what the lady said - I couldn't really understand her. Thank - You - Sony

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Tech support = funny but frustrating

 

Lady: My mouse doesnt work.

Me: Ok what exactly is the problem

Lady: No matter where i move it the pointer doesnt move.

***30 min of cable unplugging and manuevering and of course reboots***

Lady: I think i got it

Me: Really, what did you do?

Lady: my mouse was upside down.

Me: Ok.......

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My mom calls one Sunday and tells me while checking out some links a friend of hers sent over a pop-up appeared warning her of a virus.

 

She goes ahead and clicks scan and repair. 2 days later I finally get over to check it out and it had gotten so bad it required a fresh install. All pop-up privelages revoked, new limited user accounts created.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.


×
×
  • Create New...